This is Dycko Keays (a.k.a. Mighty Dyckerson) coming to you LIVE from Dyckersonville…where we have just learned that our beloved Willo is being held at the L.A. County Jail in California.
This comes after Willo appeared on the popular “Price is Right” TV game program earlier today. She was apprehended by CBS security and subsequently charged with assault and battery after allegedly attacking host Bob Barker.
According to witnesses who were in the audience, Ms. Keays stormed the stage shortly after taping began and pushed Mr. Barker to the floor. She then ripped off her clothing and began fondling the popular emcee in front of everyone. Willo was quickly subdued by a Barker’s Beauty and dragged from the studio via Door #3.
After complaining of chest pains, Mr. Barker was rushed to the hospital for observation. He was later released, and offered this statement to the press:
“In all my years as a television performer and game show host, I have never experienced anything like this. I can only hope that sick woman gets spayed and/or neutered immediately.”
Bail for Ms. Keays has not been set.
Dycko Keays (a.k.a. Mighty Dyckerson) here again. Who is this person posting on MY blog?? This is totally unacceptable, and I will not stand for it!
My sincerest apologies to all my fans who are being subjected to this Biggest Loser garbage. I assure you, I will not rest until I locate this rogue blogger and have him or her neutralized!!
This is Dycko Keays (a.k.a. Mighty Dyckerson) coming to you LIVE from my headquarters in Dyckersonville…and I’m here to announce that I am TAKING OVER THIS BLOG!!!
That’s right, you heard me. We all know Willo is going on vacation to Tinseltown to see The Price is Right among other things. But what you DON’T know is that she won’t be returning! When she gets called on stage to play a pricing game, she’ll be in for a little surprise. You see, I’ve rigged the big wheel with 10,000 VOLTS OF ELECTRICITY!!!
So now that Willo is out of the picture, we’re going to make some changes to this dump. First item of business, I’m getting rid of this purple and green Christmas crap. Instead, I’ll going with a brown and green poop theme. All the snowflakes will be replaced with turds, and the banner will depict an image of Santa Claus relieving himself on an elf.
Next up, I’ll be trashing the Rumor Mill and replacing it with two brand new mills! First will be the Humor Mill – a place where people can share their dirty jokes with one another. And the second will be the Tumor Mill – this will be a photo gallery where people can post pictures of their unsightly growths!!!
Of course, I’ll be putting an end to all this “Biggest Loser” nonsense. Who cares about that?? Instead, I’ll be posting about MY favorite reality show, Playboy Channel’s “Biggest Hooters.” Several of my ladies are contestants this season, and I will updating you on their progress in vivid detail!!!
And you may be happy to know that there will be NO SECRETS here on Dycko’s Web! In digging around, I ran across the MASTER PASSWORD to all of Willo’s password protected posts. Just enter “P0rkR!nds” at the prompt and you’ll gain access to all of Willo’s disgustingly intimate writings! (A word of warning: Most of these are not safe for work.)
Oh yeah…and spammers are welcome here! Spam away, mofos!
That’s about it for now. I know you’re all excited. Just sit back, relax, and enjoy the fun! Dycko’s Web is here to stay!!!
